Renewal Time Fast Approaching

Hello all!
I just wanted to do my duty and remind you that it is time to renew your Amway business! I just didn't want anyone to forget!

Below is quoted text from an email sent from Amway. (surprisingly enough no threats or disparaging remarks were made in the email) Anything in RED is not a quote from the email, and is not necessarily the words, views and opinions of Quixtar/Amway et al. Rather they are just edits I made for clarity and emphasis.

Dear Independent Business Owner,
Dear owned independent,

Our records show that as of the date of this message, you have not renewed your QUIXTAR® Amway® business. Really? I knew there was something I forgot I don't care to do this year. To preserve your business rights and benefits, Do I even have to say anything about that one? I will anyway: "To preserve your employment privileges and lack of benefits," you have to renew it by December 31, 2007 and abide by everything we say regardless of morality. In addition you must build a width model where many people will not succeed and be let down, and you may not EVER under any circumstances try to train your group or develop leadership within people. Just so we are clear DO NOT try and positively affect culture in any way. Don't wait until it's too late! Renew your business today. Because we will show absolutely no leniency in any situation, even if it was an honest mistake. You will be free to start again at the bottom in six months.

You can also renew by touch-tone phone or when you place your next order (yes, we really need your money now more than ever) at 800-253-6500.

When you renew online or by phone, Quixtar will charge $59* to your credit card. To pay by check, download and print the Renewal Agreement (SA-469Q), then mail the completed form with your check to:

Quixtar Inc.
58-C2A
7575 Fulton St. E.
Ada, MI 49355-0001

To make renewal even easier next year, sign up for Auto Renew, this way you can just automatically agree to all of Amway®'s contract changes regardless of what they are. This will make it easier on both you and the corporation, you don't have to read a long piece of paperwork, and we don't have to tell you what you are agreeing to.

All the best for a profitable 2008 (for Amway® of course! cuz we rnt gonna pay yer QBI!!!1!!11!111 one one),
Your QUIXTAR AMWAY Sales Team

PS. Be sure to remind your downline to renew, too. (Even though you cannot recommend what is in their best interests, or we will sue you.) For a list of those who haven’t yet renewed, go to View & Manage Line of Sponsorship and select "Have not renewed," then click the “Display” button. There you will see a list of probably 30,000 to 100,000 people from TEAM alone. (If you are privy to that trade secret information.)

*Includes $50 renewal fee plus $9 IBOAI fee (This is a pointless fee that you pay to support a board that has no power to help you with your business, or protect your employment privileges. Also we need to mention here that it seems as if all of the members of this board who truly care for your best interests, and not only about themselves, have either quit or been fired from this board, thus rendering the board itself pointless to you the owned).

Well all, I hope that helps so that no one misses their renewal date!
Dude, wait... what?